Looksies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi'ya deviants of the strange and even strangerer,


I was wandering through DA then I found free journal skins!!!!! It's like things
just get better and better. First I finish almost all of my important assessment then I find out
I can get Assassins Creed 2:- Black Edition with concept art and extraz on Sunday and now this!!! It's incredible,
it's sensatable, it's freaking FANTASTIC!!!!!! School's out next Friday tooz I'm happy for that, but things
aren't exactly A okay if you get what I'm saying. I just feel like crying, i should have a cry, maybe things might
turn out better if I do. I just wanna get out and forget about society for a while. Might be going down to the Gold
Coast these holidays for a while so that'll be great, isolation feels good. I'm probably gonna get my skates on
Betrayal too, I've been neglecting it, and some of my other stuffs- still wondering whether or not to put them on
here though, they have a tendency of 'upsetting' people. But I live in a "free country" so I'm just gonna keep doing
whatever I do until it is illegal cause I have the freedom of speech with me baby

Anyways, I have a feeling I'm gonna be grounded for most of the holidays. Why? Because my parents feel like it :\
Their all na na na na na na and we thought you were responsable, blah blah blah you can't do this,
you can't do that, have to be back by bah bah bah.... *I don't wanna listen to this crap* I'm an angsty teen fer
cryin' out loud!!!! They think that I'm always gonna be a sweet little girly girly who they think won't rebel against
them if they tell me what to do all the time Omg, talk bout funny. It's not like I chose to get depressed and
want to dress up in black and want to buy spike collars etc and get more piercings in my ears and get my hair cut and
coloured in freaky ways. *sigh* They shoulda seen this one coming. Damn you 2008! You ruined my life! I just wanna be bloody normal, but oh no, I can't even do that now because I have a very disturbing
morbid fettish hanging round my neck like some bloody lead laden scarf!

If only I had stayed in Malta... I'd be twice as smart, I'd be happy, wouldn't have walked into the middle of
WWIII with two of my best friends, wouldn't have lost one of the craziest and funniest people I had ever met, wouldn't
be sighing and saying "Oh I wanna go back home now", I'd be with the loyalest friends in the world AND I'd have my
dearest friend in the world with me. He's smart, funny, kind, smexy , understanding, tolerable, sweet, a
hopeless romantic, knows 3 different languages FLUENTLY and has the outmost warmest and friendliest hugs evar.
But now I lost him and Chris, both of which I miss like crazy, both of which I want a hug from right now and can't get.
*pout* But I might be going to Malta again sometime after Year 12 when I finish half my uni studies and go to England
to finish the rest. And I miss Luke.... and Nathan and Max and Ramis and Stephanie and Jurgen and Rodney and Chanelle and Lisa and Diana and Daniella and Kimberly and Christian and Karmenu and Brenda and Catherine and the twins-Rowana and Chantelle- and Leanne and Rachael and Patricia and all of my form 1.04 class at Maria Regina and all of my other friends that I made there. Not to mention Luke- my adorable cute and cuddly resident emo and goth- and Adrian, my supposed boyfriend of 6 years, I may have broke up with him due to many reasons but that doesn't mean I don't love him anymore or don't miss him like crazy. It's kinda weird, that everything had to change between me and him because a stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid STUPID guy over here reminds me of Adrian in every single way possible that is known to man. And not to mention how much we've fought over this idiotic person. If only he hadn't been here, then maybe would things have been better. I mean I don't blame him for hating this guy, I mean I'd feel pretty much beat up if the guy I knew and thought the world of spent more time face to face with her than me. I'd beat the crap out of her if that happened Thankfully he is a nice distance away from here and can't accidentally strangle him Though it would be funny to see it happen. MY MONEY'S ON ADRIAN!!!! He kick boxing and ice hockey now apparently He'll win. I miss you like crazy, call me cause I know you read my journals even though you say u don't.

Maybe if this "thing" hadn't been there and he hadn't got dumped and all leave me alone I don't wanna see the light, maybe things could have been better. I don't know, its cruel of me to say all this but I'm the one who has to freaking make sure that I won't start crying in front of everyone when he does something that Adrian would, I remember and its just too f***ing painful on my heart. Its hard enough waiting two years up to see Adrian again, let alone be able to hug him constantly, whisper in his ear, go out on proper dates with him or be able to kiss him at last... if I wanted my heart to go all suicidal on me I would have asked it but this just ain't fair. I say it so often but it bloody is!!! I'm tired of feeling broken and powerless and guilty when this guy hugs me, I'm fed up of crying at night cause I want a simple life again, I'm over watching people just get over break ups and just walk away from something that could be the greatest few months ever and most importantly I want to stop cutting myself when ALL this shit gets the better of me! Some people get it all, a perfect boyfriend and a happy life. But my freaking destiny is spread all over the damn globe and I have to find the shards myself. And it god damn hurts . No one ever knows till they've tried it and they should, its sooooo much fun And just when I thought someone else could fill the holes in my heart, stop the bleeding and the emo-ness they walked away too. And I don't blame them, they ain't goth, how can a freaking normal person like a goth and an emo, honestly?

And let's not forget our resident oh-I'm-out-to-remind-you-of-your-boyfriend-and-hurt-you-all-over-again guy. I can't tell you this to your face cause I know some would smash me over it so here it goes cause I know there's a 50 50 chance that you'll read this if you hit your pretty little head, so here it goes, there'no going back after this one.


I tried to help you get over your pain but in the end you made mine worse, I hope you feel happy bout it









Yours truly, darkly, enigmatically and brokenly,



~Reora56 "Cause I'll be there for you, as the world falls down...." Jareth the Goblin King:- Labyrinth

Um..... hello, this is a footer and no.... I'm not taking back anything I said in this....